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I haven’t always worn lolita on a day-to-day basis. My mother isn’t that fond of it (she still makes remarks about me wearing petticoats or knee socks when I’m home for the summer) and my high school didn’t exactly have a great population of people who appreciated alternative dress. My friends didn’t mind it of course, but the rest of the school was an entirely different story. So up until college, I didn’t wear it that often. But for the past three years I’ve worn it on average a few days a week. So I thought I might share some things that I’ve learned about reactions and how to deal with people.

The Frat Boy and the 12 Year Old Girl I find to be the most snarky. Which is odd, but I suppose they have the same mindset of “Make fun of it before it makes fun of you.” Elderly people and little girls tend to give me the nicest compliments, or ask questions politely. Girls in their teens or twenties tend to either give me snotty looks (typically the Abercrombie-wearing crowd) or ask me questions, sometimes polite sometimes not.

Comments: Most Common “Are you in a play?” To which I really want to ask what kind of play would let their actors wear their costumes around town? But regardless, I get this on pretty much a daily basis. “Where did you get those shoes?” About my Rocking Horses most often. Typically I just tell them Ebay, sometimes if they seem really curious about them I explain about Vivienne Westwood. “What’s going on?” I think normally people assume I’m going to a costume party or in a parade or something. I normally just tell them that I dress like this all the time.

Comments: Weirdest I get the strangest comments from people who know what the fashion is which is really odd to me. A lot of the girls I’ve met who are familiar are really nervous when they talk to me, so I suppose that’s why. My favorite story is about this one girl came up to me in the cafeteria at school and asked me, “Are you a loli?” I was wearing something pretty casual so I said something like “Well, sort of right now, but normally yes.” and she replied with “That’s cool. I’ve never seen one in real life!” I’m pretty sure that she had just seen pictures online and that sort of thing, but it was just the funniest comment.

Dealing With Comments: Good I have a typical response I give when explaining the fashion when normal people ask, which goes a little something like this, “It’s a Japanese fashion that’s based on Victorian England.” It’s simple, pretty to the point, and normally just gets responses about looking like a doll or confusion about why anyone in Japan bothers to research Victorian England. And remember to always say thank you. Even if the comment is a little odd, it’s good to put a nice face out there for the fashion.

Dealing with Comments: Bad Sometimes, I will admit, I’ve been mean to people. A frat boy once asked me where Toto was (I was wearing a blue striped dress, apparently frat boys can’t tell the difference between stripes and gingham) and I just yelled “F*** You!” over my shoulder as I walked past. Sometimes, a snide comment deserves an equally mean reply. Overall, stupid little comments like “French Maid” or “Strawberry Shortcake” I just ignore. Sometimes on a bad day it can get grating, but it’s something you just have to be thick skinned about.

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